I was already rich, b!tch

Most Namibians measure wealth in curious ways. For some, it’s managing to buy a full tank of petrol without first checking the balance on the FNB app. For others, it’s surviving January with airtime still left over from Christmas. But for Cedric Willemse, “wealth” looks like a N$12.9 million farm, a N$750 000 Jeep, a N$980 000 Hilux, and enough bank loans to make even Trustco blush.So when he stood in court this week and declared that he was already loaded long before Namcor, you almost had to respect the confidence. “I was already rich, b!tch,” he might as well have shouted, mic drop and all. And just like that, Namibia had its new catchphrase of the year. Forget “struggle kid” or “economic emancipation” – we now have Cedric’s gospel of pre-loaded prosperity.According to Cedric, he made his fortune in South Africa, running butcheries, sports bars, nightclubs and a bottle store. In short, the man monetised steak, beer and loud music – the holy trinity of southern African happiness. He cashed out with about N$12 million before returning to Namibia, like a prodigal son with a cooler box full of biltong and brandy for his ‘roerie roerie’ mixes.And yet, despite these riches, Cedric still found time to grace Namcor with his expertise. He insists he wasn’t dismissed, no sir – he resigned, like a wealthy gentleman who gets bored counting his millions. “Please, keep your parastatal salary,” one imagines him saying. “I’m only here for the vibes.”Now, some of us ordinary mortals may wonder: if Cedric was so fabulously wealthy already, why does he seem to owe the bank for every major asset he owns? The Jeep? Bank loan. The Hilux? Bank loan. The Rehoboth flats? Bank loan. Even the farm was financed through Agribank. Namibia, meanwhile, is still waiting for a miracle bank that will finance bread and milk for the rest of us.But here’s where the comedy gets delicious. One of his tenants in Rehoboth has apparently stopped paying rent, claiming the flats were fraudulently obtained. Imagine the audacity. If that logic caught on, most Namibian landlords would be out of business overnight. “Sorry boss, I googled your name and you look shady. Rent cancelled.”The prosecution, of course, thinks Cedric is a flight risk – because nothing says “patriotism” like having two passports and a farm mortgage you can always skip out on. But Cedric insists he believes in himself and his business acumen. And why not? In a country where some politicians can’t explain where their N$3 million cars come from, Cedric is at least creative enough to blame his wealth on biltong and bottle stores.So as we watch this saga unfold, one thing is certain: Namibia has just been gifted a new national slogan. Next time you’re broke at the end of the month, just look your creditors in the eye and say, with Cedric-level confidence:“I was already rich, b!tch.”It won’t pay the bills, but it might buy you some style points

I was already rich, b!tch

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Namibian Sun 2026-03-19

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I was already rich, b!tch

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Namibian Sun 2026-03-19

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