An open letter to all Namibian men facing life troubles
Society often expects men to lead and provide for their families. This responsibility is not for the faint-hearted; it requires courage and commitment. Men have responded to this call in different ways: some have remained steadfast, while others have wavered. Those who wavered have often retreated into obscurity, while many, tragically, have harmed themselves or others. This open letter is directed to all Namibian men facing life’s troubles, as a reminder that challenges are temporary and can be managed.
In recent decades, more Namibian men have resorted to harming themselves and others. Today, mental illness and suicide regularly dominate our news headlines. One thing is clear: no problem is bigger than another person’s problem. Many of the suicide notes left behind reveal the intense inner suffering that the deceased carried silently.
It is undeniable that both men and women suffer from mental illness arising from relationship breakups, paternity disputes, pressure to succeed, competition among peers and family, financial difficulties, and other hidden personal struggles.
However, these issues often push men into an abyss of constant worry about what may happen to them, since society expects them to remain strong and upright. This experience drives many into endless cycles of imagination about the future, overthinking different scenarios in the hope of finding ways to cope.
Overthinking, however, traps a person in replaying past mistakes and condemning himself for failing to live up to the values he aspires to. In his thirteenth letter, On Groundless Fear, the Stoic philosopher Seneca warns of the dangers of such thinking. Lori Huica, a Stoic survival and resilience facilitator, explains:
“The Stoics had long recognised that our imagination had ramifications throughout our psyche. It could impact our wellbeing, our actions, and our perception of the world and of ourselves. It could skew it in such a way that it would lead us to self-deception. There is no benefit to continually complaining about things outside our control, and in fact, we are warned against the potential dangers of allowing our imagination to run wild. Anxiety and depression are by-products of this type of thinking, to be transformed by our own will, inner strength, and rationality.”
In truth, some issues torment us more than they should; some torment us before they even happen; and some torment us when they should not trouble us at all. In short, imagination often creates unrealistic expectations that cause us to panic and lose control of our lives.
In conclusion, Indian spiritual leader Sadhguru often advises us to lower our expectations in order to avoid disappointment. When faced with challenges, seek professional counselling or spiritual guidance from church leaders. Take one step at a time, and resolve your problems peacefully. Do not let your imagination magnify your troubles - more often than not, the things we fear never actually happen. Do not blame yourself for past failures. You cannot change what has already happened, but you can shape what happens next. Turn your disappointments into lessons, and remember: life’s difficulties are temporary.
*Collen Kurana is a PhD student at the Durban University of Technology. These views are shared in his student capacity.
In recent decades, more Namibian men have resorted to harming themselves and others. Today, mental illness and suicide regularly dominate our news headlines. One thing is clear: no problem is bigger than another person’s problem. Many of the suicide notes left behind reveal the intense inner suffering that the deceased carried silently.
It is undeniable that both men and women suffer from mental illness arising from relationship breakups, paternity disputes, pressure to succeed, competition among peers and family, financial difficulties, and other hidden personal struggles.
However, these issues often push men into an abyss of constant worry about what may happen to them, since society expects them to remain strong and upright. This experience drives many into endless cycles of imagination about the future, overthinking different scenarios in the hope of finding ways to cope.
Overthinking, however, traps a person in replaying past mistakes and condemning himself for failing to live up to the values he aspires to. In his thirteenth letter, On Groundless Fear, the Stoic philosopher Seneca warns of the dangers of such thinking. Lori Huica, a Stoic survival and resilience facilitator, explains:
“The Stoics had long recognised that our imagination had ramifications throughout our psyche. It could impact our wellbeing, our actions, and our perception of the world and of ourselves. It could skew it in such a way that it would lead us to self-deception. There is no benefit to continually complaining about things outside our control, and in fact, we are warned against the potential dangers of allowing our imagination to run wild. Anxiety and depression are by-products of this type of thinking, to be transformed by our own will, inner strength, and rationality.”
In truth, some issues torment us more than they should; some torment us before they even happen; and some torment us when they should not trouble us at all. In short, imagination often creates unrealistic expectations that cause us to panic and lose control of our lives.
In conclusion, Indian spiritual leader Sadhguru often advises us to lower our expectations in order to avoid disappointment. When faced with challenges, seek professional counselling or spiritual guidance from church leaders. Take one step at a time, and resolve your problems peacefully. Do not let your imagination magnify your troubles - more often than not, the things we fear never actually happen. Do not blame yourself for past failures. You cannot change what has already happened, but you can shape what happens next. Turn your disappointments into lessons, and remember: life’s difficulties are temporary.
*Collen Kurana is a PhD student at the Durban University of Technology. These views are shared in his student capacity.
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