Why did the chicken cross the road?
Greetings, oh fellow earthlings. Many of us are probably aware of the classic tale-cum-riddle 'Why did the chicken cross the road?' Well, for those who are not familiar with the tale, ask your neighbour's five-year-old kid.
It usually starts with the asking of the question 'Why the chicken did cross the road?' and this can be answered in almost any fashion based on the topic at hand. Seeing that most our leaders take things literally, I have always wondered how they would reply to this riddle.
To put our curiosities to rest, below is a list of possible answers that can be obtained for this riddle from the following esteemed institutions and individuals. Eish, truth is indeed stranger than fiction.
Bank of Namibia:
“We believe that the chicken assumed that it will grow in stature and value by crossing the road. When you take the number of times a chicken crosses the road, in any part of the country, minus the number of times it actually remains in its cage, it goes without saying that its trips across the road are highly likely to reach economic maturity by 2030.
Domestic Workers Union:
“How can a person let the chicken cross the road instead of at least giving it to the domestic worker to eat? Our members deserve more for their hard work. This just shows how much disregard employers have for our members.”
Prime Minister's Office:
“Well, we are proud to note that because of government's efforts in fighting poverty and bringing development to marginalised communities, chickens are nowadays crossing roads. If it were not for the tireless efforts of the government of the day, a chicken would have never even imagined crossing the road. Mind you, that road that it crossed was once known as J.G. Strydom Avenue!”
Trade Unionist:
“Our chickens are tired. If they don't cross the road to greener pastures, they will starve. Give them pay hikes and they might just stay in their cages. By the way, when did the chicken cross the road?”
Swapo Party Youth League:
“This cannot be allowed to continue. For how long should chickens cross the road? The politics of yesteryear do not apply to the youth. Let the chicken remain home and send the chicks out and guide them across the road. The future belongs to them.”
Council of Churches in Namibia:
“This is an indication that we are living in the last days. Can you imagine a chicken crossing the road? Isn't it enough that we had a talking donkey already? One talking animal is about all we can handle at the moment.”
NamPol Chief:
“This is a warning to all chickens attempting to cross the road; please cease with this practice immediately. The police will not be held responsible for our actions. We will not hesitate to open fire when safety is compromised. In fact, once we are done with you, we will bury you – whether you survive or not.”
City of Windhoek
“We cannot allow chickens to cross the road at any given place. We are building a new crossing lane to the cost of N$4.5 million to allow for the safe crossing of chickens. All chickens will soon be moved to that area. Those still using un-demarcated area to cross the road will be evicted.”
When I put the question to some of my friends from various ethnic groups, I was even more baffled by the responses.
Tjeripo Tjikondomboro:
“Mbuae, me I don't care about the shicken. Why you don't ask me about the cow – we are facing drought and if we do not get enough water for our cattle we will face calamity and because….”
Tangeni Shilongo:
“That one she is a marathon chicken, you won't catch her! I always tell Meekulu to chop its neck closer to the body – now look, it has run away and crossed the road.”
Derrick Dausab:
Ekse, why the siken did not fly. Aram tog, now they are going to catch him and cook him to sell at Soprite.
Fernando Kloppers:
Watse dom vraag is daai (What kind of stupid question is that…) F$%%^K jou man. Die blerrie chicken was probably tired of stupid questions like this. Well done, bra chicken. You rock!
Need I say more?
Until then…
[email protected]
It usually starts with the asking of the question 'Why the chicken did cross the road?' and this can be answered in almost any fashion based on the topic at hand. Seeing that most our leaders take things literally, I have always wondered how they would reply to this riddle.
To put our curiosities to rest, below is a list of possible answers that can be obtained for this riddle from the following esteemed institutions and individuals. Eish, truth is indeed stranger than fiction.
Bank of Namibia:
“We believe that the chicken assumed that it will grow in stature and value by crossing the road. When you take the number of times a chicken crosses the road, in any part of the country, minus the number of times it actually remains in its cage, it goes without saying that its trips across the road are highly likely to reach economic maturity by 2030.
Domestic Workers Union:
“How can a person let the chicken cross the road instead of at least giving it to the domestic worker to eat? Our members deserve more for their hard work. This just shows how much disregard employers have for our members.”
Prime Minister's Office:
“Well, we are proud to note that because of government's efforts in fighting poverty and bringing development to marginalised communities, chickens are nowadays crossing roads. If it were not for the tireless efforts of the government of the day, a chicken would have never even imagined crossing the road. Mind you, that road that it crossed was once known as J.G. Strydom Avenue!”
Trade Unionist:
“Our chickens are tired. If they don't cross the road to greener pastures, they will starve. Give them pay hikes and they might just stay in their cages. By the way, when did the chicken cross the road?”
Swapo Party Youth League:
“This cannot be allowed to continue. For how long should chickens cross the road? The politics of yesteryear do not apply to the youth. Let the chicken remain home and send the chicks out and guide them across the road. The future belongs to them.”
Council of Churches in Namibia:
“This is an indication that we are living in the last days. Can you imagine a chicken crossing the road? Isn't it enough that we had a talking donkey already? One talking animal is about all we can handle at the moment.”
NamPol Chief:
“This is a warning to all chickens attempting to cross the road; please cease with this practice immediately. The police will not be held responsible for our actions. We will not hesitate to open fire when safety is compromised. In fact, once we are done with you, we will bury you – whether you survive or not.”
City of Windhoek
“We cannot allow chickens to cross the road at any given place. We are building a new crossing lane to the cost of N$4.5 million to allow for the safe crossing of chickens. All chickens will soon be moved to that area. Those still using un-demarcated area to cross the road will be evicted.”
When I put the question to some of my friends from various ethnic groups, I was even more baffled by the responses.
Tjeripo Tjikondomboro:
“Mbuae, me I don't care about the shicken. Why you don't ask me about the cow – we are facing drought and if we do not get enough water for our cattle we will face calamity and because….”
Tangeni Shilongo:
“That one she is a marathon chicken, you won't catch her! I always tell Meekulu to chop its neck closer to the body – now look, it has run away and crossed the road.”
Derrick Dausab:
Ekse, why the siken did not fly. Aram tog, now they are going to catch him and cook him to sell at Soprite.
Fernando Kloppers:
Watse dom vraag is daai (What kind of stupid question is that…) F$%%^K jou man. Die blerrie chicken was probably tired of stupid questions like this. Well done, bra chicken. You rock!
Need I say more?
Until then…
[email protected]
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