Where are the fathers?
That Namibia is a patriarchal society is a given. The concept of respecting your elders is rhetoric that is often thrown about in both politics and general conversations. Some experts are of the view that the Founding Father, both as a concept and a personality, is what binds a lot of Namibia under one concept, one idea. We are raised to fear our fathers as the disciplinarians and they are to lay down the rules in their households and for their children. They are considered the breadwinners.
Women assume the surname of the man when they marry and even if a child is born out of wedlock, the mother registers the child in the father’s surname.
Often, we hear of cultural practises which are abhorrent to one group of people and yet, utterly accepted in others, such as women crawling into a tent on their hands and knees as the men had already filled up the place and were sitting. The women are not allowed to be higher than the men.
We are not questioning culture or respect in any way. We also recognise the strides the Swapo government has made with its 50/50 gender representation.
However, in light of yesterday’s celebrations of Father’s Day, we would very much like to know, where are they?
They are at the shebeen or local bar while their children languish with grandparents in the village. They are beating the mothers of their children or out making babies with other women. They are unemployed and contribute maybe a bag of porridge once every few months to the lovers, wives, mothers, aunts and grandmothers who are raising their children. Or, as we have seen of late, they are killing the children and the mothers of their children.
Our boys and our girls are growing up with no inkling of how to act like a good man or how a man should treat a woman. We are raising a generation of lost children. We need the fathers to step up and be that. We need the fathers to embrace their roles as caregivers and educators and protectors of the family. We need to fix that part of what is broken in Namibia to ensure that tomorrow looks better for all of us.
Can the fathers please stand up?
Women assume the surname of the man when they marry and even if a child is born out of wedlock, the mother registers the child in the father’s surname.
Often, we hear of cultural practises which are abhorrent to one group of people and yet, utterly accepted in others, such as women crawling into a tent on their hands and knees as the men had already filled up the place and were sitting. The women are not allowed to be higher than the men.
We are not questioning culture or respect in any way. We also recognise the strides the Swapo government has made with its 50/50 gender representation.
However, in light of yesterday’s celebrations of Father’s Day, we would very much like to know, where are they?
They are at the shebeen or local bar while their children languish with grandparents in the village. They are beating the mothers of their children or out making babies with other women. They are unemployed and contribute maybe a bag of porridge once every few months to the lovers, wives, mothers, aunts and grandmothers who are raising their children. Or, as we have seen of late, they are killing the children and the mothers of their children.
Our boys and our girls are growing up with no inkling of how to act like a good man or how a man should treat a woman. We are raising a generation of lost children. We need the fathers to step up and be that. We need the fathers to embrace their roles as caregivers and educators and protectors of the family. We need to fix that part of what is broken in Namibia to ensure that tomorrow looks better for all of us.
Can the fathers please stand up?
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Namibian Sun
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