Cry standing up

27 August 2019 | Columns

Elizabeth Joseph

The year is almost over and though it is going by quickly, it has been challenging.

I recently came across this catchphrase: Cry while standing up. This speaks to facing adversary with resilience and courage.

True introspection is what got me to use and realise this phrase in all corners of my life. Plenty of times we allow ourselves to dwell on the things that we can’t necessarily change at that moment. This causes us to feel more and more drained, and unable to focus on the stuff that can and should be changed.

Take my confidence, for example. I was at level nine on the confidence spectrum less than two years ago, and now I can with all honesty say this has dropped by 50%. Can I change this? Yes. Does it need to happen immediately? That is debatable. I see it as a journey - a reprogramming of the mind.

So I can give it time. Instead of giving myself time to learn to love my 65kg self and see beauty in my love handles and short hair, I want to rush things.

I have thought of every single hair growth product under the sun, while watching my starch intake, because that is what causes a big tummy. I have deprived myself of simple pleasures, because I am afraid to pick up a size 32 jean at Identity.

I forgot that this is a journey - a beautiful story that is still in motion.

Now, on to the things that need urgent attention. Going back to school and getting a licence. Why is it so difficult for me to even get my learner’s? I am literally the only one among my peers who is slacking in this regard, and thank God, this puts the necessary pressure on me to get my s**t right.

In this case I will say that I cry while standing up and I will not allow the setbacks to become too comfortable in my life. I am learning that every risk you don’t take yields a 100% failure rate. Instead, I should keep taking that test, even though I have failed twice (inward sigh).

It is important to take a mental inventory of where you were and where you are. Remember that you are your own worst critic, so be easy on yourself. Even if it seems irrelevant to you, because of the huge expectations you place on yourself, it still counts.

Realise who you are and what you want to achieve. Focus your energy on the most compelling challenges first, then you will build up the courage to tackle the not-so-nice tasks.

I love how God works with the universe, and just at the moment when everything seems dark, then something spontaneous happens and that brings you back on track and back to a position where you are in charge of those feelings and your life.

Knowing what you want, and constantly working towards it, may seem selfish to some people, but so what? Yes, so what? Why shouldn’t we have it all? Why shouldn’t we demand to be treated a certain way?

The moment you put yourself second, is the moment you teach everyone else this is where you belong. And then you want to later force people to put you first? This won’t slide.

Fear will make you lose all parts of your freedom and whatever courage might have been left in you. People often think I am selfish and/or stuck up. If you don’t know me, you will think that I am too far up my own behind and that I am too overconfident. Please. I don’t really care.

If you don’t hype yourself up, guess what? No one else will.

You will remain with a wounded ego every time people voice their opinions. Now don’t go disrespecting people’s voices, but don’t dim your sparkle to accommodate other people’s self-esteem.

As per usual, this is another column about my daily thoughts. Please don’t go bash me on social media. During the last stretch of 2019, join that club, start your business or leave that man. Whatever you do, make sure that it is something that you can carry with you into 2020.

Remember, be good to yourself, and others.

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